Tuesday, April 22, 2008

End of the Road

This is the end of my blogging for awhile. I've decided that I don't have anything that interesting to say that's not depressing. I think I'm going to go back to the old fashioned diary where I can write away and burn it if I want.

All the work issues and the feeling surrounding my brother in law's death just don't seem to fit on a public blog.

I thank Renee (my only reader!) for all your comments which have made me feel better. Thank you so very much!

One day I'll appear on here again with fun stories of my dealings with Hollywood or something else fun. I may start posting cakes I've made and decorated - cake decorating always made me happy.

Keep your chin up and be kind to your fellow man and especially to animals.

PEACE- OUT!!

Monday, April 21, 2008

Make that Call! Make that trip!!

I had a great visit with my family this weekend. I missed my husband terribly. I told everyone we are socially stunted because we NEVER have social engagements then when we do, they are all on the same weekend. So he had a birthday party to go to in his home town while I was at my sister's house.

The play my niece was in was the cutest thing I've seen in awhile. The kids sang their songs and did their dance moves in place with no fear of what they looked like. They were truly having a ball and it was refreshing to see. I loved that sheepish smile I got when she finally found her family, including me, out in the audience. I waved and she gave me a little wave back. So darn cute! My nephew had a great time in the audience too. He enjoyed the play and was happy that his teacher in school was sitting behind him. Several of the girls were flirting with him after the play and he loved it. They kept poking him and he kept saying 'Ouch' loudly. I was afraid that they were making fun of him or something. But when I asked him if they were hurting him he smiled and said, "No, I just say that because it makes them laugh". Flirting 101- he passed! He also told me he likes to play with Tomboys instead of Girly-girls. But one of his friends is a Tomboy and a Girly-girl so that makes her a "Tomgirl" he said. FANTASTIC!!

I helped my sister with her flowers. Turns out she knew what she was doing and knew what she wanted so we dug and weeded and pruned and mixed and fertilized. We ended up with a beautiful display of flowers by her mailbox and dashes of color in the two beds in the front of her house. Just in time too because she didn't know it but her husband had arranged a surprise birthday party for her on Saturday night. Her friends and their kids showed up and brought everything. They were GREAT! We all jumped out and said surprise! It was great because she had no clue. The kids played and we all had ice cream and cake. My nephew got to show off his new Wii my husband and I had gotten him. I think the whole family was happy.

As I was leaving I wondered why I hadn't been down to see them since Christmas. It's only three hours~ away. Since I lost my brother in law last year unexpectedly, you would think I would've learned to not take people, especially family, for granted. I get to see them in two weeks though so that's great. No Wii at my house so I'll have to find some other toys, etc.

After leaving my sister's house, I went to the family reunion. My mother's side always has one each year. I'm so glad they do. My 85 year old grandmother looked better than me! I hope I have that to look forward to- still looking great and feeling great. She's one tough cookie. We only seem to eat and run though and not have that much time together. I got to eat with my Dad and my sister/husband/niece/nephew. Great food! .....although someone actually brought chicken nuggets- the kind shaped as dinosaurs and tater tots. My niece asked for squash and greens and butterbeans. Good girl!

Last, I went over to Durham to check on my brother-in-laws house. We're trying to sell it and while we had a buyer, it fell through. Guess it's hard for folks these days to get a loan with all the junk loans that were dealt in the last 5 years. The flowers in the front of the house were so beautiful. It made me sad. I wondered if my brother in law liked them when they bloomed. He may not have cared- I never asked him. We had last visited him in 2005. I keep wracking my brain to remember if I was nice to him. All I'm sure of is that I took him for granted. His passing has left a huge hole in my life too (and my husband's of course). I loved my brother in law dearly but don't know if he knew that. He was so funny. I loved when he came to visit because he and my husband would get going on something and run it into the ground. It was hysterical. He always made me laugh. He had the biggest laugh too. I don't think I ever told him how much I looked forward to his visits. I don't know that I ever told him that I appreciated him visiting on Thanksgiving. I don't know that I ever told him how proud I was of him. But I'm sure I took him for granted. And I have to live with that every day.

Make that call to someone in your family. Send a 'thinking about you' email or card to someone you haven't talked to in awhile. Schedule a trip to visit your family. Take some cookies or cupcakes to your elderly neighbor that you've only waved to on occasion the past year. Just take 5 minutes to reconnect with someone. You never know how long you or they'll be here.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Family!

It's been busy as it can be here at work. But the last two days, I've realized how lucky I am. Some people I know seem to have the worst luck and also continue to make bad choices for themselves and wonder how they got in a bad situation. I have such a great family! My husband and I have gotten closer and closer and I feel like our marriage is getting better with age. (corny but true) I'm so lucky to have him. Plus he's a darn good artist and I'm so proud his first piece got published.

I'm going to see my Sister and her family tomorrow. My niece is in a play and I'm bringing the nephew a Wii. They are good kids. I can't wait to help my sister plant flowers and teach my niece how to use her cake decorating set and bowl against my nephew on the Wii. Plus I'll give my bro-n-law a hard time and he'll kid me about how much older I am than him (not much). I'm so glad my sister and I got such good guys. THEY ARE OUT THERE!

When you think you have it bad, someone always has it worse. I have to remind myself to stop bitching and remember to be thankful. I swear a positive attitude helps to get through stressful times.

Once there was a guy here at work that got on my last last last shread of a nerve. He has no social skills whatsoever and is extremely egocentric. I can't stand these types of folks -plus they tend to have entitlement issues. I continually let this guy drive me crazy. Finally I had to ask myself why I was letting his actions control me. Why did I give a crap at all? So my new tactic when I can't figure out a problem is to ask- What's the opposite? What's the absolute craziest thing I could do to solve this situation. So I decided I'd make an effort to be nice to him. Not phony- can't do that and it drives me crazy too- but I would be polite and say "Hello" to him in the hallway. Just doing that for a week decreased my stress level by 90%. I had been pouring negative energy- not to get too new-age'ie- into avoiding him or making a point NOT to speak to him when our paths crossed. Plus I was telling everyone how much I couldn't stand him. Negative energy only made me stress more. Just saying "Hello" in the hall and not focusing any energy on this guy relieved the stress I brought on myself.

So when someone or something drives you crazy- think of what's the opposite of this situation and see if that will help. Remember that no one drives you crazy- you ALLOW them to drive you crazy. Try for one day to say "Hello" to that person who seems to walk in a cloud of negative energy.

Last of all- we are a nation that thrives on gossip. Negative gossip fans negative energy. Try for one day a week to quit gossiping or to decide not to join in gossip. It will make you feel better. I have two friends who I've known for a long time. One of them used to continually try to play one of us against the other. We figured this out one time when my friend confronted me on something she thought I said about her. We made a pact then and there to tell the other person that we would not talk about anyone who was not present. We took control and put an end to gossip and an end to a potentially friendship breaking situation. I actually had to cut the game-playing friend out of my life for a year because I didn't want to be sucked back into her back-biting and gossiping. She came around and we are friends again. It was the smartest thing I could've done for our friendship.


So good vibes and positive energy to everyone. I swear it will make you feel better.




- I am not running for political office but I support this message